Dodo Departs...

I know what’s ensuing would be hilarious to many of you. Many would say how vella is the guy to write about his dead turtle. Yes, Dodo was my turtle. I swear I would have laughed if I read someone else write sumthing of this sort. Its funny but it’s true. It’s funny that Dodo was my pet turtle. It’s funny that his death created a void in a responsible life towards his food and keeping. Its funny that I am missing him.

It was the 4^th of October 2006, when my sister came running to me with him veiled in her fist. I thought its sum radiant artificial feng-shui piece and picked it up. It moved a bit and I moved bitter. Almost threw him off by a meter, flabbergasted to see a living turtle in my house, more so on my palm.

I got my laptop the same day… The much awaited gizmo which was suffering deep contemplation for many months then. “Did Dodo prove lucky? “, I thought to myself and this heightened my belief in feng-shui. I realized that he’s lucky. Clicked his pictures, made his video, observed how he fluctuated his much apprehensive neck movement, in and out, out and in and intricately observed how he ate food in tiny gobbles.

He was a red eared slider, one of the rare species of turtles found in the world. I was even immersed in vanity for owning a rare one now. Almost everyone from the colony, from the kids to the nighty-clad aunts came over and paid a visit to him, some nearly falling down when they realized its real. Some liked its shell, some asked what the red mark near his ear was, and some turned him upside down to see how he excreted and how he stored food in such a small body.

Even the name giving was much profoundly executed. One of my cousins suggested DODO to be the name. I persisted on TITO, while my sister quickly started calling him with the former to avoid my silly suggestion; I silently took the denotation in my stride.

He was one head turner, placed in a bowl near the wash basin. Every time we went to rinse our hands or wash our face, he would sneakily peep out of his shell to see whether it was me or my sister. He actually liked her a lot. She was the only one to hold him all day long and make him play on her palms. He hated me somehow. Even led to extreme discomfiture when my friends dropped in and wanted to see him. He would by no means like an adamant Roman, come out of the shelled closet, only cuz he detested me.

Winter morns, he was left on the ground for a satiating sun bask. He would run happily throughout the terrace to see himself free from the bowl and the murky water inside it. His small webbed feet left utterly cute footmarks behind his royal gait, and we used to imitate his walk with our protruding bellies to copy him.

The winters are here again. The sun is back in a pleasant way. The paunch is the same and the tiny worms are waiting… but the bowl is empty and the gait is gone…Dodo is dead.

He just died this morning all swelled up in his bowl, with his apprehensive neck completely out this time, but tremulous eyes just to be beholding. I am sure he must have wanted to embrace his breathing for my sister to come back from school and give him a final coaster ride on her palms, I am sure he so wanted to see my hateful glance of him, I am sure he wanted to enjoy the sun this year too. But he silently passed away.

He is well buried near the Christmas tree where he loved playing and hiding under the leaves. He silently sleeps in there…no aunties, no kids around him this time. He sees us all. My sister cries and I wish the bowl had something moving in it all over again. We miss u lil one! We truly would miss u in the warm winter sun…!!

rise!!!awake!!and look around!!...u are being watched!

You switch the shower on and stand naked in front of the mirror, examining your body while you wait for the water to warm up. After you've washed, you towel yourself dry, wondering if you've put a little bit of weight on or may be admiring your curves and finally you're sure your bum looks bigger…
Now imagine a tiny hidden camera is watching your every move, and has been for months. Your roommate’s boyfriend or your neighbour installed it so he could watch your most intimate bathroom moments from the comfort of his own bedroom. He even put a mirror up to make sure the room had no blind spots. Therefore, even the toilet isn't private now! As horrific as this might sound, scenarios like this do happen – and it is easier than ever for voyeurs to buy hidden camera equipment to spy on unsuspecting victims.
What is voyeurism? The Oxford Dictionary defines a voyeur as 'a person who gains pleasure from watching others in a sexually demonstrative position or activity – but this doesn't quite sum up the whole picture.
Most of us are voyeurs in some form or another – its part of the human nature. However voyeurism is harmless if it is approved, it does take a more sinister form when it's a secretive act. Indeed, the second dictionary definition of a voyeur is 'a person who enjoys seeing the pain or distress of others'. And suddenly, it doesn't seem quite so inoffensive!!
Our twenty-first century voyeurism isn't only the job of the supposedly harmless 'Peeping Tom', peering through his neighbour's window, hoping to catch a stolen glimpse of her undressing. Neither is it confined to the opportunistic voyeur who hopes to see a skirt blowing up in the wind, or waits for his waitress to bend down to give him his coffee.
Modern technology has allowed voyeurism to evolve by leaps and bounds. Now, we can not only be watched in private moments without our knowledge, but filmed, too. One’s image could be captured without one’s knowledge in a shop changing room, at the gym or even in one’s own very home. What's more... it could then be broadcast online, on one of the numerous voyeur websites in the fine cyberspace.
Amazingly, voyeurism wasn't illegal in earlier days, but now it gives legal protection to the victims of non-consensual voyeurism. The legislation means anyone observing a person in a private act for his or her own sexual gratification is committing a crime. Offenders can face imprisonment for up to two years or a fine. It is worth noting that it is not an offence just to watch someone without their knowledge – the act only becomes criminal if it is for the sexual gratification of the watcher or a third party.
While the emotional scars of someone who has been watching your intimate moments can be devastating, physical injury or aggression is unlikely. Only a small percentage of voyeurs will go on to commit worse crimes and, although 95% of rapists and sexual murderers have displayed voyeuristic tendencies, this in no way means all voyeurs will go on to offend in such a manner. It does mean anyone experiencing the crime should play safe and report it.
Almost any household object these days can be transformed into a camera or listening device. By doing a quick search on the web, you can find a number of shops selling hidden surveillance equipment. Tiny cameras can be hidden in anything, from a lady's handbag to bedside alarm clocks and you can buy long-range listening devices that are indistinguishable from mobile telephones. All you have to do is dial a special number and the phone will instantly be turned into a secret transmitter, wherever it is in the world.
It isn't only equipment designed specifically for the purpose of surveillance you have to worry about. Normal mobile phones with cameras and videos can also be used for voyeuristic purposes and who knows it better than the Indian victims of MMSs...Remember DPS Dhamaka??
Mobile companies are coming up with sets which make a sound when a picture is clicked just to avoid the increasing voyeurism, but I think it’s too late now. It’s like first pinching a child and then rocking the cradle. Though Hutch’s ‘bina ijazat kisi ki photo na lein’ is a great campaign, but the cynic whispers - why? Did cellphone operators wake up one morning and realize that their social responsibility quota for the year had not been fulfilled???
So after all this long and informative discussion, now if you find you have been watched, filmed or recorded in a place which can reasonably be expected to provide privacy, the law will protect you, so it is vital that you report it. There is also counseling and help available if you think you have been watched.
This may seem extreme and unnecessary and, for most of us, it is. Statistics show that around one in a five hundred women can expect to have been photographed without their consent. With the law now taking non-consensual voyeurism seriously, it's also comforting to know that, if it has happened to you, there is finally something you can do about it. Since voyeurs do not hurt anyone and because they are secretive, they are rarely caught but the average age of onset appears to be before 15. The disorder appears to be life-long unless treated.
Voyeurism is definitely a sinful act because it violates the privacy of a person. A voyeur who watches a naked person or persons without their knowledge essentially "steals" from them that privacy and intimacy intended only for the self and or the person's spouse. Even if the voyeur has the consent of the other(s), it is still sinful. People say, ‘voyeurism is not committing adultery’; but everyone who looks on a woman to lust for her, has already committed adultery with her in his heart." So voyeurs here…you definitely need to WATCH OUT!!

Lucknow in 2006 Is...

Khuda aabad rakhe…Lucknow phir bhi ganeemat hai
Nazar koi na koi acchi soorat aa hi jaati hai…

This is what upholds a member of the Nawabi Legacy of Avadh. Even after momentous changes both technically and ethically, Lucknow is far better than other cities which have completely adopted a newer selfhood.

We all have grown, played, enjoyed, loved and lived in this city of Nawabs and Kebabs, but have we ever given a thought to what Lucknow actually ‘is’ for us. We’d say it's the idyllic home to us or maybe we’d say it’s the fragrance of 'itra', the musical notes, the sound of dancers' trinkets, the sweetness of 'dussheri' mangoes, 'makhan-malai', the courtesy in words and of course the 'Mehman Nawazi'. However, it may sound strange, but Lucknow is, to many people much more than what meets our eyes.

The big question mark remains whether the city of Adab once known for its refinement in speech, entertainment, dresses and manners is still the same or a different state of affairs altogether. We asked a few modest Lucknowites and this is what they had to say.

Lucknow is...“Heaven to me”, said a worker at Cappuccino Blast who finds Delhi, Mumbai fake and Lucknow the only genuine city. Lucknow is ‘hard-work’ to a sweeper who silently cleans a pavement near the bustling Sahara Ganj Mall.
“We had so much of space to move in earlier days…now I feel like I am pushed along with the crowd”, expresses an old teacher who is now taught how to live life. “Joint families have almost vanished”, aches an eager father waiting for his kids to come back. Lucknow is ‘pain’ to him.

Lucknow is ‘Freedom’ to a Muslim girl who still looks around with surreptitious eyes, this time without a Burkhah. Lucknow is ‘Sumptuous’ for young men at Tunday Kebabi barely managing to speak while enjoying the paranthas. The city is ‘complete enjoyment’ to a set of school kids with faces dull with tensions of home-work. 2006 Lucknow is ‘Ostentatious’ to a Chikankaar who has seen the refashioning through his austere eyes. Lucknow is ‘marvellous architecture’ to a young couple who quietly etch their names within a heart shape on the monument.

Lucknow is ‘Secular’ to a woman who lost her husband in a communal riot whereas it is ‘Happening’ to a damsel at McDonalds who is unable to pronounce ‘Nazaakat’. The city in 2006 is viewed by its residents with different stances but what comes out unanimously is a saga of both complacency and anguish that this ethnic city has underwent. It is ‘Progress’ for a man who covers his ears when a car blowing horn passes by. It is ‘Convenience’ to an old worker who loves ‘autos’ more than the ‘tangas’ and a ‘Hassle’ for those who cling to a Sumo maxi cab almost falling down. Lucknow is ‘Noise’ to a famous businessman whose shop is a sad reflection of it's past glory.

“The malls and multiplexes are giving the city a new identity. It's no more the ennui of sitting at home”, chuckles a group of girls near IT College. It's ‘Technology’ for them. An old couple who doesn’t want to be a part of ‘Technology’ elaborate, “one is always open to attacks. If only youngsters feel what the other party is growing through, it will be a better place to live”. Lucknow is ‘Insecurity’ to them.

Lucknow is ‘Service’ to a kid who evades education to make chai for the Sahebs who come to his stall. It is ‘Good Education’ for another when English medium schools have begun to proliferate like mushrooms in muck. Lucknow is ‘Everything’ to a Nawab who is watching his city die with time. It is ‘Decency’ for a group of boys practicing Gandhigiri and ‘Recklessness’ for drunk brats who run their car over an old beggar.

Lucknow today is an amalgamation of both positive and negative elements that make up the LKO of today. ‘Subah-e-Benaras aur Shaam-e-Avadh’ is still meaningful to those who know how to enjoy changes. It is no more the soothing, relieving city for those who miss the shaded colonial bungalows at Dalibagh. For some, it is fast, progressive and on a move whereas for some it is an era lost amidst a sea of smoke-belching vehicles and clanging rickshaw bells. For few, it is jeans and skin tights vis-à-vis those who still prefer shalwar-kameez not forgetting the concealing Dupatta.

The city has changed considerably. The kulfis and gajak at Aminabad still taste the same, as does the chaat at Hazratganj. But the years have taken their toll and the tongas have been replaced by cycle-rickshaws weaving between two and four wheelers in the chaotic traffic. The station still stands untouched by time, the Bhulbhulaiya still spells romance, but the lions in the zoo have lost their voice and need to be set free, and the monkeys have long fled or been captured.


While the regal grandeur of Lucknow is still not a forgotten dream, we the youth should start bothering about our historic city. The place which has given us a lot from its treasures of mannerisms and values now wants something from us in return. No, it's not about reshaping Lucknow…it's all about changing ourselves so that we may, with pride say…
Lucknow hum pe fida…hum fida-e-lucknow!!!!

So the next time I ask what is Lucknow to you, don’t let me write an article full of oxymorons like these. Isliye…
Muskuraiye ki aap Lucknow mein hain
Gungunaiye ki aap Lucknow mein hain